I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
i feel like someone uncorked me like a wine bottle and pulled a living animal outta my arse.
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
Are you awake? Because I would like to know whether or not I should refrain from giving my evil laugh when I enter the apartment...
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
