yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
just by requesting 'I think we're alone now', not only did you achieve emptying the bar, but you also rubbed it in the owners face.
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
what part of "i slept with our hot teacher" are you not excited about?!
the part where you beat me to him
fair enough.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I thought you died. Don't forget it's burger night.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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