thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
you want your laptop back?
are you giving me my laptop back, or cashing in on our break up sex?
both.
come over.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Dude, you were so wasted she couldn't wait. She was grinding your face while you were passed out in the yard.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
After sex he brought chocolates and said he loves RuPaul's Drag Race. How many points does he score for that?
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
the raccoons are back...
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