Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
afterwards we were spooning and he said he wished he was a kangaroo so he cold put me in his pouch and keep me forever. I left as soon as he was asleep.
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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