Okay, I have a threesome with foreigners and suddenly I'm a man-whore
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
by 11 am we'd already been drunk twice. how much lower can you go?
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
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