Just lit a joint with steel wool and a 9 volt battery... thank you 3rd grade science class
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
She bit a glowstick open. Apparently they burn. We bonded while she washed the chemicals out of her mouth as I did double shots of Jager.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
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