i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Really? And is this the kinda party we talked about earlier?
Yup. It's just me crying in a closet eating soup
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
Also you think METH is on the same level of wanting to see the movie cats? We’re gonna unpack that later
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone’s dad. You’re also like a second dad to me as well. And one who I send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
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