Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
yeah well we're currently on the phone and she's telling me about how much she misses me and all this shit and i muted myself and i'm watching porn.
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
No you are right. With a nickname like Monster Cock, you shouldn't expect him to want to "just talk". I'd be insulted too
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I never thought I would be having sex behind a shower curtain that wasn't in a bathroom.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
well it was great until i saw his anime body pillow
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Randomize
