lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
Just climbed to the top of a frozen waterfall! Do you want to do drugs tm night? The two are unrelated.
Just realized I left my heels in their microwave. Whoops.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
This baby is an asshole
I wrapped my scarf around his head and then made him go down on me
And I also said, "probe me"
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
I’m a little confused...we were told by Cheeto Jesus and his minions multiple times that we would stop hearing about coronavirus the day after the election and, yet, I am still hearing about coronavirus. Is it possible they lied to us again?!?
Randomize
