I like to think it a success when the cops are called
i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
once i realized i was actively trying to drink the beer i was sweating out of my body i knew it was time to go to bed
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Wait so they unscrewed the bathroom door to find you naked?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Caprisun cuts tequila surprisingly well...
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Never start off a conversation with "speaking of STD's..."
Randomize
