At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Also do the "tongue the pee-hole" thing.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Phosphoglyceraldehydration... why the fuck is this a word
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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