Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
If we went to a costume party as Batman and Robin I would go as Robin, that's how much you mean to me
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I think we should have realized the night was going to be nuts when it started with a bum dying in front of my house.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You're a problem for me, dick game too good. In the future when I'm with someone I actually wanna to date, now I'm gonna compare.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Randomize
