If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Ill trade u your bra for a run to the liquor store...
Being the only sober one.. I had to feed you guys doritos. You kept licking my fingers.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
I'm pretty sure I told everyone in the bar I hadn't had sex in five months. And then I offered everyone calamari.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
We will just distract him with tacos and porn.
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I may have made out with your roommate and your cousin tonight. In my defense I thought both of them were your cousin.
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