You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
He sent me a picture of his dick saying "your throne my lady" for my birthday. He knows the way to my heart.
This girl is wasted dancing to The Final Countdown. She's grinding on a guy who came to the bar in a track jacket and a wife beater
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
My drunk is wearing off and im starting to feel like this dolphin tattoo was a bad idea.
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