sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
Apparently in gay bars the restroom signs are just a formality. Its a free for all in there
please stop judging me for buying a handle of soco on a thursday at 10am. it was on sale, i'm thinking of my future.
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
i found waldo and immediately set him to work eating me out. please have more out of season costume parties.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
I forgot my backup drink is supposed to be pedialyte and vodka. Add in the shit I'm losing as I drink. Win-Win right?
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
My dad told me that my grandparents are giving me $20,000 and my actual response was "do you know how many kittens I could buy with that?!?"
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