i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
Woke up in 100% not my clothes this morning. Third time this month. Fuck. Tequila.
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
One blow job doesn not make me gay.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize
