He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
So did u puke in his bathroom or all over his Olympic medals? Please say medals...
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
i stole nothing, broke nothing, and stabbed nothing. aren't you proud of me?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
Almost ran over girl selling candy bars for charity. Pretty much obligated to buy at that point.
Please tell me you aren't concussed from dancing on the stripper pole
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
We lost a person.... if you see a man in yellow shorts and nothing else walking around let me know...
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Randomize
