I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
What time are you coming? Can you stop and get mouse traps and trojans?
You have mice?
no why?
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
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