I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
my goal is to not remember how i make a living by 9pm saturday night
Cuz last time you told me I was going to be shocked about something you got a hand job from a stripper in canada
I'm gonna lurk in the mother fucking bushes and watch karma take him down like a gimpy gazelle.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
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