this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
just 'accidentally' changed my relationship status to 'in an open relationship' just to see what offers I might get if I were to dump him. it's not looking good
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Frats are adorable. They make mediocre guys think they're worth a shit.
...the American dream.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize
