You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
Dude, I would hit that so hard that whoever could pull me out would become the king of England
I saw two morbidly obese women get winded after fighting over the last motorized wheelchair at Walmart
These are the moments in life you observe a force greater than us at work
I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Randomize
