brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
u know whats better than using ur vibrator? using it w/ jeopardy on in the background and half moaning the correct final jeopardy question. yeah that just happened.
It was like having sex with a donkey. Everytime she got close she would kick me.
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
My grandmother cheats at beer pong and has been rubbing her tainted victory in my face for an hour now.
He took my virginity but also my remaining pizza. i dont know how to feel right now.
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Everything is covered in gelatin and pam cooking spray. Jesus be a shield.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
My mom found my empty case that I hid in my room and just said "now why don't you be a responsible underaged drinker and throw it in the recycling" and walked away. I'm in shock.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
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