Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
Dude... there's chunks of hair all over the floor, and no one knows how they got there. You guys just made out right?
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
No, I did not fuck him for football tickets. I fucked him for tickets to the superbowl. I'm not that much of a slut.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Um..... I have taste. The only thing I am going to bedazzle is my vagina.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
I’m excited to finally meet my stalkee and his penis!
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