Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
yes you're required to wear a bikini its the snowpocalypse beach party
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Randomize
