What did we do last night that was yellow?
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
Does making ice cubes at 4 in the morning count as being productive?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
How'd the date with the redheaded dentist go?
She didn't like my gingervitis joke
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
I got poked in the eye with a penis last night. How's your day?
You'll love it there. Trust me. Cheap tequila, pretentious beer, tall white guys who will treat you badly. Its got everything you like.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
