I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
The beer-amid has reached five feet. Caitlyn has a taser. GTG
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
wine pong. its mother daughter day and i think she's mad. I smell like jager
I don't need you anyway! I have puppies and booze!
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
Randomize