I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
All I remember is running out of the bathroom with one shoe on and the other in my hand. Pretty sure I was yelling as well.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Randomize
