glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I don't think he's ever woke up with a paraplegic stripper sitting on his face before.
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
I just really don't even know what I would do with a boyfriend... Like do I just kiss it and then leave it in the corner? Like how often does it eat??
Mom just sent me an email. The subject line is "How to avoid a urinary tract infection"
LET IT GO MOM
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
I’m literally lecturing this class on professionalism, while my body is undoubtably covered in leftover cum from last night. I’m a fucking role model.
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