Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
Hes the only one i know who can talk to a girl for an entire hour abuot the science in starwars and still get laid.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
I would have done it. But then again I am a starving student who can manipulate my brain into thinking my decision was somehow morally justifiable.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
Is there a coat check? I stole 10 vases of flowers along with two bottles of champagne and I'm not sure what to do with them.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Randomize
