I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
I found bruises on my neck from barfing out the window.
And I'm also limping. I just wish that I had self control. I'm 23 for fuck sake and I'm sitting at work, with mascara down my face, vomit on my clothes and an unknown black substance on my tits. How will I ever find my Greek husband if I keep this up?
She's drinking vodka out of a windex bottle. She is spraying it in her mouth and at strangers.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
This may be a weird question to ask someone who is 21 years old, but are you grounded?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
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