U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
rolled over to window for cup of snow instead of leaving bed for water. that's how hungover
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
I literally just woke up in a dog bed, in a bathtub in someone else's house...and I'm not wearing pants
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
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