ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
Randomize
