Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I woke up with her little sister yelling "she's dead !!" from the bathroom doorway.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Yeah, he's passed out in my bathroom pantsless. Is it a faux pas to look at his penis?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
