I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
She rolled over this morning and asked "did you refer to my vagina as splash mountain last night? "
I've always wanted to pass out in a bathtub
I think most people do. Your only real mistake was turning the water on first.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
I just want you to know that we eye fucked the shit out of someone who just got drafted
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
You now have the mental image of me flying off into the sunset with no pants
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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