Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
if you fuck our toilet off the wall again, i'm going to be so mad.
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
You were crying hysterically
So that's why my heels were in the oven...
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
Randomize
