Trust me, I wear more condoms than socks. I wouldn't risk infecting my cock. It's my livelyhood.
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
He did a double fist pump when he discovered the Magnums fit and skipped back towards the bed.
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
He walked into my room in the middle of the night, whispered something about the patriot act, and took my tv.
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
U should feel bad.. u r like a sex politician. All talk and no follow thru
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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