Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
I created a new tequila drink. it is a mix of excitement and fear instilled in innocent people.
whoever gets the blood i just donated is getting a shit ton of free thc
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
He just tried to eat my hair and he keeps talking about pissing on everything, come home soon I beg of you
Maybe I'll make your dreams come true and pee on you tomorrow.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
No. No. Fuck you! You can do your own grocery shopping.
Randomize
