Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
He made me pinky-promise that he gave me an orgasm.
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
I dont pretend to understand how the heterosexual mind works. Its a mysterious cavern of stupidity and disgusting sexual acts.
Normally getting fucked up with the owner and suggesting he motorboat me wouldn’t help my chances of a promotion, but this is 2020 and he definitely enjoyed it
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