one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
Your cock is gonna weep like a baby
I must have drunkenly masturbated really loud last night, cause my roommate and his wife wont look at me
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
im so proud of her that she got shit faced finally. This must be what it feels like to see you kids get their diploma or some shit.
Why is there an ambulance refusal in my pocket? I'm never going drinking with you again.
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I am watching a girl dressed up as santa, full on fat suit, try to fight a six foot 200lb man. A reindeer threw beer on everyone. Shit is going down
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