He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
The kid that passed out is still in the bathtub filled with ice and the empties
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
