I wish there was a facebook app that filtered my notifications to show only the ones having to do with people who'll fuck me.
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
He told me that "my little fuckpig" was a term of endearment in Britain. I think I'm in love.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
My parents get here at 6 so I have to make it look like a sober virgin lives in my room by 5.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
