Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
I left the guinea pigs on the dryer. Make sure to take care of them.
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
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