If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
I've never had a better reason to do blow of a Pittsburgh strippers ass than to try and keep pace with my dad.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
Randomize
