the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
Randomize