I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
I'm buying this stripper a house, I don't care what her name is.
dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
What?! Why else would they put table cloths on a table if not for discreet oral sex? That's why they were invented! Read a book...
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Randomize
