Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
just convinced brandon semen are bugs that crawl in your pants and make gooey juice. now hes convinced he has them lmao
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
I think it is impossible 2 take a person seriously when their last name is Pancake
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
I see your walk of shame and raise you a day in jail wearing a girls old workout clothes.
Yeah, but she is forever sending my vagina on some sort of mission.
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
Ah. Hot spring. Infinitely less skeevy than a hot tub. These North Carolinian dudes are all class.
He's unconstrained by sanity, physics, or his liver.
I will be DAMNED if anyone but me breastfeeds my cat.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
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