I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
All I remember is that the bartender wouldn't give me scissors cuz I was too drunk
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Having him as a wingman is like telling the girl you already have aids
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
This hickey is now green and covers half my neck. I have an alien hickey. I think he thought my neck was dinner.
My worst fear almost came to light...I was choking and the cats stared at me like they had no problem eating my face if I died
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Anyone who can sit 4 hours in a doobie circle with their feet in a kiddie pool is ok by me
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize