That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Vanilla vodka + chocolate soymilk does NOT equal an epic milkshake.
It tastes like I coughed up blood....hello liver damage, I've been expecting you.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I'm having a staring contest with a raccoon.
Where the hell are you
He's winning.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
Considering the fact that everyone took the wrong jacket from that party, should we casually try to return the chalice and soccer ball we stole from last night?
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
Randomize
