have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
Rent Disney Oceans. Smoke a bowl. Fast forward to the seal section. Then call me.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Dude. It just hit me for a second time. My thumbs are huge and moving very quickly. Like stampeding buffalo...
you did a full monologue with your sober self last night. different voices and everything.
todays sighting is titled: Bum taking pictures with an invisible camera.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
It's going to be so weird waking up tomorrow morning fully rested completely sober and not covered in piss or bruises.
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
Randomize
