YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
I'm sad we weren't friends when I went through my "I like drugging my friends" phase
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
They wouldn't let me on the bull because I couldn't even sign my own name... She let me try 3 times...
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
Im sober enough to understand what people are saying but drunk enough to understand its hilarious
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
