dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
i swear to god even though i took those meds before coming here i did not hallucinate zulema silently throwing up into a breakfast burrito
Thanks for gettin' me home, killa. Have no IDEA how I woke up pants-less on the bathroom floor at 4a.m. You're like a big, angry guardian angel.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
You challenged a dog groomer that she couldn't cut human hair ... How's the shaved head
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
when they cut me off i played the entire Justin Bieber playlist and left for another bar that didn't think i'd had enough to drink
New one isn't as good asmy ex. She won't put her tongue up my butt
Peter this is your "ex"
I stand by what i said
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